A Care Package for Ariyonna
On March 6th, while waiting to board a flight home, I got a FaceTime call from one of my sister-friends, who simply and quickly asked that I check the Instagram message she had just sent to me. Me, being me, thinking it was something funny and/or ratchet - the type of content I usually enjoy distracting myself with on social media, I started laughing and asked her what it was. She, who is usually equally lighthearted, appeared very measured as she asked me to just please watch it. Within seconds, my friend was in tears and telling me that my work is so important and though she didn’t know what I could do about it, she hoped that I could do something. Naturally, I immediately went to my Instagram account and checked my inbox messages for the post; and just as soon as I allowed it to play, I was in tears as I boarded the plane.
Earlier that day, Instagrammer @lilwavedaddy posted an emotional video of herself as she prepared to do a little girl’s hair. Within minutes of being placed in the chair, the little girl, Ariyonna, saw her own reflection on the IG Live video and responded, “I’m so ugly.” The stylist, whose real name is Shabria, immediately shut down Ariyonna’s negative self-talk, telling her not to call herself ugly. Soon after, Ariyonna burst into tears, tears not unlike those many of us who share her complexion have cried ourselves. Thankfully, and rather beautifully, “Auntie Sha Sha” showered Ariyonna with a series of compliments and affirmations that she was indeed beautiful, and special, and loved.
I thought about Ariyonna for much of my flight home. I especially thought about my sister-friend’s tears, and her suggestion that maybe I could do something for her. I know she thought of me not just because loving and affirming Black girls out loud has become my life’s work, but because I’ve “done something” in the past…
In 2013, when 7-year old Tiana Parker was sent home from school because administrators at her predominantly Black charter school said her hair, which she had recently loc’ed over the summer, was “unacceptable” and violated school policy, I put out a Facebook call to women and girls who wore their hair in locs.
Within 12 hours I had hundreds of submissions - pictures and love notes to Tiana, from women and girls from all over the world, including a very special note from renowned writer, Alice Walker.
Then, in 2014, after working with CNN and Soledad O’Brien to produce the final installment of Black in America, I traveled to Richmond, Virginia to love up on a little girl by the name of La’Shawnte who was featured in the documentary. In one of the segments, she told her mother that she didn’t want to be dark-skinned anymore because “dark skin is ugly.” I went to Richmond with photographer Ann Blake, we took her shopping and had a photoshoot which I would include in my then latest project, #PrettyPeriod
Fast forward to Ariyonna…
Honestly, I wanted to get a video crew together and get to Ariyonna. My creative mind saw this as yet another opportunity to open a public dialogue about colorism. Because what the thousands of comments and tweets across social media revealed is a painful truth - we cried right along with Ariyonna, not just for her, but because many of us were her, many of us ARE her.
But given the recent COVID-19 pandemic, the timing and the reality of the moment wouldn’t allow for a visit. So, I decided instead to organize a care package and put out a call for all her virtual Aunties and Uncles to contribute to it.
Dozens of gifts (including this amazing collection of books ) and thousands of dollars in donations later, I shipped the care package to Ariyonna in hopes that she will continue to be reminded that she is beautiful long after the media attention fades.
Dear Ariyonna,
We’ve seen your tears turn to smiles and giggles all over the news and social media. And that makes us all so happy. We hope that you will keep smiling into forever. We know that there will be times when the world makes you question your own beauty, but when that happens, please remember this moment, and please remember these words - you are beautiful, Ariyonna!
WE LOVE YOU!
Signed,
Auntie Yaba from #ProfessionalBlackGirl and your virtual village of Aunties and Uncles, including
Aaris of Be Creative Bead Designs by Aaris K.
Aliya King
Auntie Almaz
Auntie Amanda
Auntie Aneesah at La Madama Handmade Dolls
Auntie Danielle
Auntie Deidre
Auntie DeJhan
Auntie Ebony Nicole
Auntie Jasmine in Charlotte, NC
Auntie Khalilah Harris in Baltimore
Auntie Kikibo
Auntie Lyn Sisson-Talbert (LynSpiration Bath and Body)
Auntie Petu
Auntie Sarah
Auntie Seanre
Auntie Shakima
Auntie Tee
Auntie Toi
Auntie Tonya
Auntie Tressa
Auntie Woo
Auntie Zee
Aunties from Kokila
BettyRose Green
Black Women Stitch
Briana and Jessica of Sewn Together Reflections
Brown Street Media
Bruce Melendy
Cassandra Veals
Chandra Alston
Chandra Montgomery
Charlotte Watson Sherman
Chet Anekwe
Christine Nwaezeapu
Connections Family Resource Center
Courtney R. Baker
Cynthia Addison
Daphne
Daphne Isom
Deborah Douglas
Debra Powell-Wright
Deirdre Pinkney
Denene Millner
Detreca Taylor
Dior Richardson of SELah
Dorothy Mae & Dominga
Dr Jeanne Porter King
Dr. B. Afeni McNeely Cobham
Dr. Gail Lewis
Esmeralda Esquire
Eye Heart Teaching
Fela and Friends, Handmade dolls
GaBBY Bows - Confidence
Gemela N. McClendon
HomeSewn by Leslie
"Iya Oloriwaa!
Egbe Iwa Odo'kunrin Egbe Iwa Odo'binrin Rites of Passage Program"
Izzy Parnell-Wolfe
Jamilah & Naima
Jamina Cole
Jasmine Hoskins
Jasmine Price
Jennifer Abner
Jess Hooper
Jessica Rodriguez Becker
Joy Blk
Just Us Books
Kat Conteras
Kemi Akinjiola
Kilah Willingham
Kim Battle
Kimberly Taylor
Kristal Moore Clemons, PhD & Karis Iman Clemons
Kyle Evans
LaRel Rogers, Relish Factory
Lauren Parish
Laurian Bowles
Linda Rhodes
Lupita Nyong'o
Lynn Brown
Malaka Grant
Maulana Drew
Maya James
Melanie Johnson
Melody Short
Michelle Kendall
Miranda Childers, CEOMiss Black America Atlanta Pageant
Miriam Capellan
Monica Davis Stean
Monique Roberts
Monisha Jackson of Krawfish Kidz
Morgan Thornton
Nicola Knight
Nicole Clark from I Find It Incredible
Nicole Richardson
Philly & Friends
Phoenix Netball Club (Bermuda)
Pressley Alston
Pretty Girls Association
Rae Paris
Raeven Wood
Regina Gloster
Regina Langley
Ruha Benjamin
Sadiyah Malcolm founder of SELaH
Shayla’s Creative Side
Shenell Tolson
Shericee Campbell
Sherlita Montgomery
Sherri Synsmir
Shreeta Quantano
Shy Williams / Proud & Black
Sistah Geek
Sommer Murphy
SSBarker
Stephanie Renee
Steve Booth
SydandFriends.com
T. Tara Haynes
T.R. Edmonds
Tangie Jennings & family
Tanika Zuniga
Tara Nicole Whitaker
Tarana Burke
Tennille Raney
Terry Jecoby Young
The Classroom Calligrapher
The DeWaal Family - Shae, Matthew & Sage
Tieshia
Tracey Lewis-Giggetts
TV Washington
Valerie Lyles
VaNatta Ford
Veronica Chapman, Boxxout Enterprises
Victor Lewis
Victoria & #TeamKiana
xoMTG.com Family (PB&Jtoo, Keys of Philadelphia and Nasya Marie)
Yelitsa Jean-Charles, Healthy Roots Dolls
Yona Deshommes